It’s Just So Much
I needed time to process everything. In a way, I was forced to as Jesse required my iPad for his schoolwork. It was really the best thing for me.
An unimaginably awful amount of happenings came about within two months. My family is hurting. We will hurt for a long time.
Cathy died on January 26. She was an amazing and beautiful person. I have known her for more than half of my life.
She read books faster than most people eat dinner. She created the most magical things out of yarn. That is a witchery beyond me. Cathy was not afraid to try new crafts. She was inspiring.
Her catch phrase was “oh, well shit.” It’s classier than my “fuck, or fuckity fuck.” Not that I will stop.
I hurt for myself. I hurt more for Gary, her sister, children, grands, the people that will always be part of our family. So many people loved her.
This is where I am indebted to the school board for depriving me of technology.
I am thankful.
With the crap that happened in December, I am still here. I was told I would need to contact palliative care. I did not need them nor did I go to hospice.
My father-in-law, John, and I were hospitalized with Covid-19. We are still recovering. We are getting better. Recovering from something like this is hard. Our lungs and muscles are still weak. The fatigue is pretty awful. We are slowly overcoming the bastard.
I will always be thankful to have a mother-in-law like Cathy. I truly have the best in-laws. All four of them.
I am grateful for my mom. She has been helping with my boys when I can not do the laundry or wash the dishes. Covid zaps the energy out of you.
My heart will continue to mourn.
I will continue to savor the small things and celebrate the big things.
I love all of you.